3 things that many men don’t understand and how one deals with them

1. Metrosexual or spornosexual is not the same as homosexual
When I observed a friend of mine – back in 2007 or some time like that – while he, rapt by admiration for the shining pop star, watched Justin Timberlake perform live on MTV Music Awards, I wondered: “Is he secretly gay or what?”

But the friend of mine is indeed not gay – he is just a common metrosexual guy who wants to be inspired and influenced by a successful and appealing male person. The current trend in terms of appearance is that one as a heterosexual male ought to be metrosexual and/or ‘spornosexual’ (a less common but continuously more used term) like for instance Jeff Seid. Mostly masculine, but probably with some kind of androgyne touché, and with appearance and attitude as the backdrop.

This certainly has got to do with taste, but I have not seen guys who look better than Korean pop groups like TVXQ and Super Junior. I think that they overall dance and dress very well, while guys like for instance Jeff Seid has the better physique and therefore I am more inspired by someone like him in that respect. I also think that a hybrid of different traits can be quite fruitful. Unless one wants to be dressed in training oufits 24/7, broaden the horizon beyond Seid Wear and Gorilla Wear.

Anyway, the main point is to emphasize that if a guy think it is ‘gay’ to inspect talented celebrities and fitness models, then the person might have got it all wrong. If he sits with a beer in his hand, then it is most likely the case.

Solution: If you have not yet adapted to the current ideals, do it.


2. Alchohol consumption will not make you masculine but feminine
Alchohol is a complex topic of its own, and some significant studies indicate that small or moderate doses – especially of red wine – can be benificial for one’s health and well-being.

However heavy drinking is not good at all, and it is misguided to think that it is somehow masculine to drink – even if it is in the company of one’s male friends. In fact, beer consumption in particular increases the estrogen levels, and in conjunction with junk food and physical complacency it will eventually lead to man boobs and other androgyne characteristics.

Solution: Unless you perhaps work in business, finance or entertainment, contexts that might require frequent social drinking, consume selectively – that is mainly on special occasions and/or in interesting locations, such as Las Vegas, Ibiza, Hong Kong, Thailand, Tokyo, Budapest, and Seoul. All else is probably dull and waste of potential and money.

3. Girls/women don’t need you anymore
In the wealthy parts of the world, like for example the U.S., U.K. and Sweden, girls/women do not, generally speaking, need men anymore for their material and economic support and safety. If a divorce or breakup occurs – which it often does – the girl/woman can go on and live on her own salary. This implies that the patriarchy is of the past, even though some patterns might remain, such as domestic violence. Relationships of this day that do work quite well are generally more balanced, equal and complementary, and both females and males do often become more complacent. Feminists think that this androgyne society is fine and I do not blame them. Girls and women do nowadays have a much better situation and well-being as individuals, and as a group too.

However, this type of society will also lead to a somewhat sad situation in which a significant share of males become losers on the dating market – having few if any mate choices since virtually no one needs their wallets, and/or think that they are attractive enough to have romantic relationships with. And the males who have the skills to attract more or less females will become cynical. Females too. This cynicism does partly stem from promiscuity among both sexes, magnified by popular culture, social media and online dating.

Solution: Be a top version of yourself and remain unattached, regardless of one meets one girl/woman per month or per year. One might find a good enough girl/woman some day, in the Western world or elsewhere, but until then it is more wise to invest in oneself.